Our Half Term Highs and Loathes…

My arrival at the half term blogging party may seem somewhat belated but there’s a very valid reason. Our half term hasn’t quite finished yet! Read on…

Let’s get the loathes out of the way first:

1) We enter the half term break like zombies, weary, detached and with a wild look about us, yet in a strange state of frenzied excitement about what the coming week might hold.

School pick up, dinner, baths… the evening passes without incident. We all collapse into bed aaaand: sleep. But then, determined to ruin it all, the Patience Thief and the Sympathy Robber skulk in in the dead of night and steal my two greatest reserves. I was seriously counting on these to see us (all) through the half term break unscathed. I awake the next morning more deranged than 12 hours previously. With my steadfast resources depleted before the dawn of day 1 my main fall back would have to be tea, deep breathing, chocolate, the love of a good man (my husband) and gin (not necessarily in that order).

And so it began.

2) Then along comes Lent! Why oh why in flip’s name did I dream up this stupid dumb assed idea to give up TEA for Lent?! In the first half of half term? What was I bloomin’ thinking? Tea?! My lifeblood – as in:

The indispensable factor or influence that gives something its strength and vitality….(according to Google)

But I did it, I blogged about it, and I seriously underestimated the challenge. For 4 days my head pounded. I shook (yes shook – like a real detox) I thought I had flu. I went to bed earlier than when we had a newborn. I wanted to spit at my ‘pure, detoxifying, prim-and-proper’ boiled lemon water whilst hubby’s brew sat steaming smugly on the side. I nearly passed out at circuits and I moaned A LOT. However, I stuck with it and a week on I’m still waiting for that moment when I come alive, like an expectant Mum as she leaves the dark, nauseous days of the first trimester behind and leaps into the second with a new lease of life. I’m still waiting for the lemon tea to actually feel like it’s doing something other than leave a revolting taste in my mouth. And I’m still waiting for the bloody bags under my eyes to disappear.

The up side to this loathe is that somehow I managed to find the inner strength not to give up the T in my G&T too.

3) One final loathe, and more ‘middle of the night shenanigans’ but not of the saucy kind. More of the ‘Oh I’ve got a great idea, let’s go and have a sleepover at Grandad’s and forget to pack the Calpol’ kind. Note: I never forget the Calpol. Here’s how the night panned out:

The girls are like two giddy kippers, can’t sleep, won’t sleep, before 10pm. (Don’t forget I’m still going through caffeine withdrawal here, I have no patience and wanted to be asleep by 7)

Soon after midnight, eldest wakes sobbing with earache (common occurrence, usually quite manageable with infant medication).

About 12:30: the sudden realization that I didn’t pack said medication.

1:30 – 2:30am: Jeans on over PJs, wake sleeping Grandad, head off into the night. 3 petrol stations, two supermarkets, zero chemists later and the eagle has landed. I’ve got the drugs!

3am: Calm restored.

3:20am: I can’t sleep.

4am: Dozing off. Youngest wakes crying.

4:10am: There are now 3 of us on the blow up mattress. I’m on the edge – in more ways than one. I spend the next couple of hours with my head wedged against a cabinet and a sun-lounger cushion and a toddler snoring in my face.

6:30am: Everyone wakes up full of the joys of spring. I just need a cup of tea *cry*

This photo sums up the day that followed. Oh and don’t be fooled, youngest isn’t smiling, she’s actually saying ‘I want to go home now, now, I want to go home now!’ In my head I am also sobbing and whimpering ‘I want to go home now too…’

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And the Highs!

1) Hooray! It’s TREAT WEEK! Whoop! Valentine’s, Pancake Day, hubby’s birthday, youngest daughter’s birthday… it’s like a treble whammy cake smash with hundreds and thousands of hundreds and thousands… Oh! The happy faces! The celebrations! The date nights! And the entertainment value of the sugar highs: children behaving like minions on helium running circuits of the house at a hundred miles an hour! The sugar lows are too horrific to describe. But we did have a lot of fun.

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2) The greatest giggle inducing quotes of the week. Many not great for my self-esteem but I focused on the hilarity.

Your tea smells like a garden. (herbal, obvs)

Is tomorrow an insect day?

You are the adult. And the servant.

We had chicken courage and rice for lunch.

Mummy you are like a witch saying sit properly!

Your eyebrows are like biscuits.

The stairs are like porridge.

You need a poo Mummy, you have a fat bottom.

3) The end of half term arrives – we finish as we started, like zombies. But thankfully the caffeine withdrawals are easing. The Patience Thief and the Sympathy Robber clearly took pity on me and returned in the night with my goods in time for a peaceful Inset Day. On Tuesday I awoke feeling like my old self again. The morning routine passed without incident. We’re all set to leave the house – on time – when:

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After the initial wave of panic had subsided, it actually turned into a marvellous day. Our eldest accompanied me to my scheduled meeting. She sat quietly and chose to read a little Book of Feelings from cover to cover over the Sophia Magazine I’d hurriedly picked up. She played quietly as I made phone calls and helped me with various jobs.

The school remains closed. I’m still off the tea. But we’re where we should be – on a half term high.

I hope you had a fun packed half term. Thank you for reading.

Polly x

If you enjoyed this, why not head over to Amazon and check out my children’s book:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1906954801

You can also see what I’m up to at:

www.facebook.com/wormslugmaggotleech

@wsmladventures

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